The moment when you look into infinity
I have a special feeling when I look into something infinite. When I was a kid, I had some times to look at it. It was worthwhile. It was one of the best times with myself. Looking at the seemingly cheerful blue sky on the afternoon and mysterious black sky on the night. I was a little clown fish that looked onto the vast ocean. When I looked onto the ocean I feel like I wanted to observe the entire of it. I wanted to do a journey to every single deep trench, to every single ocean volcano, to every single ridge in this world. I felt that I was so tiny but I wanted to become bigger, I wanted to know anything in this universe. I knew I couldn’t, but I couldn’t achieve any little thing unless I try. I was a tiny clown fish that wanted to know everything inside the vast ocean. A child wondering the universe. A creature wandering the wild. It became my hobby. Being with myself looking at the sky. I believe most of you experience this too.
Until this very moment I like to look at infinity. Now I’m looking at the sky, a goldish blue sky on a remote village in my country with a cup of white bloody tasty coffee, a group of good and friendly friends, a group of happy local children, and one of my best friends, myself. Imagine a boat post in a bay with a mangrove forest on its side and a goldish blue sky with cirrus clouds above. I’m in this exact situation. Let’s take a heavy breath. It’s so calm. Minus, there’s a loud sound behind, a thing that I hate the most when I want to be with myself. But nevertheless, I love this moment.
I feel so grateful in this condition, I’m tiny yes, but I still have a chance to look at something huge. I’m a tiny clown fish that like to look into the vast ocean, to infinity. I like to explore myself, I like to explore the world, I even like to go to that infinite universe if I could. I’ll use my many chances to just enjoy my own time with these infinite things. I don’t want to be interrupted by something about my physical world at this time.
The moment when you look into infinity is a precious moment where you can look into yourself, the one of the infinite things in this universe.
Maluku Tenggara, 18 August 2015